How can I calm my toddler down before bed?
Short answer
Keep the last hour slow and predictable: the same few steps in the same order, dim lights, no screens, and a quiet song to finish. Slow, gentle songs help because little bodies tend to follow the tempo.
A simple wind-down routine
- Same steps, same order. Bath, pyjamas, teeth, story, song. Predictability is calming in itself.
- Dim the lights and lower your voice as bedtime gets closer.
- Screens off in the last hour. The UK’s Royal College of Paediatrics and Child Health suggests avoiding screens in the hour before bed.
- Finish with your slowest song. Sing it a little quieter each time round.
Why slow songs help
Lullabies all over the world share slow tempos and smooth melodies, and in one study babies relaxed when they heard lullabies, even in languages they had never heard. Your own voice is the most reassuring sound of all, so it doesn’t matter if you think you can’t sing.
Try Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, The Garden Says Good Night or our slow nursery rhymes for bedtime.
If bedtime is still a battle
Every child has phases. If sleep problems go on for weeks, or you’re worried, your health visitor or GP can help.
References
- Bainbridge, C. M., Bertolo, M., et al. (2021). Infants relax in response to unfamiliar foreign lullabies. Nature Human Behaviour, 5, 256–264. doi.org/10.1038/s41562-020-00963-z
- Mehr, S. A., Singh, M., et al. (2019). Universality and diversity in human song. Science, 366(6468), eaax0868. doi.org/10.1126/science.aax0868
- Royal College of Paediatrics and Child Health (2019). The health impacts of screen time: a guide for clinicians and parents. rcpch.ac.uk
